Solving the right problem

From the time I was a teenager I thought I had a “weight problem”. I tried every diet, I tried exercising, of course I joined a gym which was a waste of money because I was too embarrassed to be seen in exercise clothes. It was an endless roller coaster ride of losing weight, being happy for just a minute before my ‘unhappy me’ would reappear and the overeating and weight gain would start all over again. Finally in my early 30s I was exhausted from trying to manage my emotions with my body and I decided to try something radical: accepting myself the way I was! This was no easy task, I did not want to be a fat girl, but can I tell you, when I finally surrendered and did the work to accept myself as I was, everything began to change! 

For years I thought what I wanted was to be thinner, I thought that was the thing that would change my life. But it didn’t because I was trying to solve the wrong problem, I wasn’t unhappy because I was overweight, I was overweight because I was unhappy!! 

Once I was dealing with the right problem, being unhappy, my weight resolved itself and what a relief to not have to diet anymore (it’s been 15+ years!). What I learned from that has helped me in every area of my life, it taught me to pay attention and figure out what is beneath the surface of the discomfort, that’s where the good stuff is and that is how real change happens.

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